UPDATE: Not even 24 hours later Mad Miriam decided in an effort to sell the place right quick, she upped the price to $449,900.
As you fine readers of the Yaniv Saga are aware, Alta West was previously awarded the right to sell the Hawthorne condo that Jonathan Yaniv aka Jessica Simpson aka Fat Jon owns and has defaulted on paying the mortgage on. The mortgage company have hired a realtor and that realtor has been denied access to by Fat Jon and Mad Miriam. The court date was set for February 26th for Alta West to demand the right to punch out the lock and access the condo, without Fat Jon‘s okay, with the help of a Bailiff if necessary. Alta West requested the court date be moved to March 2nd. Most likely a lawyer scheduling issue. Oh it will happen, and there is nothing Fat Jon can do.
A kind person let MeowMix know that Mad Miriam has indeed listed her Senior’s condo in the building called The Residence – it is located across the street from Fat Jon’s Hawthorne building.
For those that keep getting it all mixed up, Fat Jon has a condo, and Fat Jon‘s mom Mad Miriam has a condo in another building across the street. TWO condos. Mad Miriam offered to sell her place and give the money to her son, so he can keep his condo. Mad Miriam said she was going to throw her deaf disabled sister that lives with her in a 1 bedroom condo, into a care home and ditch her. I guess dragging Ilana the Deaf Sister to court in wheelchairs was worth the show? Sorry Ilana, you are being chucked over the cliff after all. Wheeeeeee-ahhhhhhhh!
Jewish Mad Miriam claimed she found a place to rent, and plans to move out of Langley to get away from all the hate-filled Christians.
THE LISTING – #404 8880 202 STREET, Langley, British Columbia V1M4E7
MLS® Number: R3091607
Mad Miriam is truly mad if she thinks she will get $424,900 CAD for the unit. Even if by some miracle she does, it isn’t enough to cover Fat Jon‘s debt to Alta West. MeowMix will break it down again after the listing photos.
Firstly the condo has gained almost 30 sq ft in size according to the listing and floor plan and is now up to 617. How two senior women, one deaf and disabled in a wheelchair, have been living in this 1 bedroom condo is a mystery Scoob. There is only a double bed in that tiny bedroom?
They clearly shoved everything into that storage locker – or onto the luxury 91 sq. ft. deck over looking the busy strip mall parking lot.
Living large Mad Miriam, those Poop songs your eunuch son writes sure bought you the best. The crammed full of crap patio image has since been removed from the listing. Maybe Fat Jon didn’t like that KiwiFarms grabbed the picture. Of note, there is no dishwasher. There appears to be a mini fridge where a dishwasher should be. Also a large deep freezer in the dining room. Is Jack’s corpse in there? What on earth did these two old frail ladies need all that fridge space for? Olive Garden left overs? We know damn well Fat Jon doesn’t cook. So I guess no dishwasher is understandable.
Live Love Laugh
So MeowMix asked one of real estate savvy BC readers for an overview of the current real estate market.
Mad Miriam’s condo was assessed at $399,000 in January 2026. $424,900, even if they got listed price, which no one is these days in that area of BC – it isn’t going to cover Fat Jon’s debt to Alta West. In BC the current average time from listing to sell date is 50-90 days. Usually after a few drops in price, those unwilling to drop the price sit in the “Buyers Market.” Often with possession dates clauses attached too. For example, if the sale is agreed to, it still could be another 1-3 months before the purchase is “closed” – due to the wait on the buyers secured funding. Realistically that means Mad Miriam, might sell in 2 months, but be waiting for another 2 months for the funds and property/cash transfer. That is if she lowers the price. The only good part of the unit – it’s a senior building 55+ age limited for residents, and those units are in lesser demand. Given the state of the unit, from the pictures, it isn’t even comparable to the other units for sale in the building.
If you were retired and looking for a senior place to move, would you want to spend cash on renovations?
Currently we know from the Alta West documents and the Mad Miriam monologue in court, some important details. Mad Miriam has a mortgage. In court she said ‘redemption was at 240,000 so close to assessment’ but those of us in the MM circles have been trying to figure out what that means in Mad Miriam language. Does that mean if she sells, she thinks she will have $240,000 left over? Or does she have a mortgage of $240,000 to PAY BACK to the bank? MM previously assumed she meant she has a mortgage of $140,000ish based on the numbers she stated in court and that she believed she would get $240,000 equity.
Either way, whatever the mortgage is to be paid out, that means less for Fat Jon. You have to also factor in the cost of the realtor fees to be paid out, and the legal costs to transfer the property, and any strata fees/fines unpaid, and any taxes to pay to date of sale…
$400,000 – 140,000 (mortgage) = $260,000.00 equity
or
$400,000 – 240,000 (mortgage) = $160,000.00 equity
less Realtor Fees, legal fees, etc
= Not enough for Fat Jon’s debt.
Alta West to Fat Jon – Fuck You, Pay Me!
For his Hawthorne condo, Fat Jon Owes $340,000 + accumulated interest since + legal fees + future costs from Alta West forcing access etc. Jon also probably owes Strata fees and MeowMix recalls the docs mentioning unpaid Property taxes. He probably has some liens for unpaid legal debts. MM are estimating he could be up to $380,000 or more, that he owes. Alta West will proceed to list it for sale. $260,000 or $160,000 equity from Mad Miriam selling her condo isn’t enough.
Even if Mad Miriam gives Fat Jon the equity – MeowMix highly doubt that Fat Jon would qualify for a new loan / mortgage for the remaining debt owed.
He has no income, he is unemployed. He has student loan debt that MM believe could be coming due soon, as we think in BC it is 6 months after the end of courses, that a borrower needs to start paying it back in monthly instalments. To top it off, Fat Jon’s condo assessment went down and in January 2026 it was assessed at $389,900.
He’s fucked, but sadly for Fat Virgin Jon, he’s fucked only figuratively.